Tonight was such a great night, a night I really needed and enjoyed. Over the past year or so my life has had so many ups and downs, hell it could have been that way for a long time. However, I’m one that doesn’t like to live in the past…
Tonight, I treated one of my best friends, Francisco P. to a show at the Rockwell Table & Stage in the Loz Felix part of Los Angeles, CA. We went to see a lil one man cabaret by my good friend Jai Rodriguez. It was a refreshing experience to see this wonderful man put his heart and soul on display for a room filled with people from all over LA, most of which he personally knew.
Back when I was barely coming to terms with the idea of what it was to be a gay man, getting kicked out of the Army for being gay, to go home and watch a lil show on Bravo with a troupe of gays making the world fabulous, in secret of course. Hell, I was living with Mom and siblings after the Army, and couldn’t be the man I wanted to be nor did I know who I was at the time. It wasn’t till tonight that I really saw the impact of that lil show had on my life. Thank you to Jai for helping this once confused Lil homie come outta my shell.
Up until tonight I had been contemplating on whether or not I should move back home. I know Mom and a handful of my closest friends that I grew up with in my hometown of Kingsville would love to hear that. But tonight I had a revelation on why I fell in love with being here and calling LA my adopted hometown. Where else could you live in a town, where you can take a short trip across town to have dinner with a friend and watch a other friend’s show, a show with some well known people, such as the ever fabulous Pandora Boxx and sweet Sunnie Rose Berger. Both as well as the star of the show you have met and know. Since moving to LA I have had many experiences like this, especially since I became a Sister. It has been because of my alter-ego Sister Mariposa Patriota that I met these wonderful people and many others around town. Not many know me outta drag, but can say Sunnie and recently Jai have taken the time and chance to get to know the man behind the drag nun.
On I side note, I draw from many elements to fully bring Mariposa, or as I call her Mari, to life. I take from notable Drag Icons, like RuPaul, Momma, Shady Lady, nearly all the Drag Race Girls, shows like Queer Eye and Queer as Folk, reality stars like Margret Cho, Chelsea Handler, Ross Mathews, and Kathy Griffin, most of which I am honored to say I’ve met in person, Thanx LA!
Had I never come to LA I would have never thought of meeting anyone that is or has been on TV, or anyone that is well known in any circles. I grew up looking up to people like these. Thinking to myself, wow I’ll never be that fabulous… One thing I truly admire about LA and Jai is a true example of this, not everyone you see on TV or read about in the many articles on line is the raging €¥π+ you hear about. There are those, and Jai mentioned this tonight they see themselves as regular people, who are simply sharing their craft with the world. Who are just as crazy and messed up as you.
So thank you Jai for renewing my faith in this crazy town. It is moments like tonight that make living in this crazy, expensive, glittery, facade of a town memorable and worth it all. As many of you, who follow my life on the social media, have read the past year especially has been rough and I had given up and lost many things in my life, I almost gave up to the point where I would not be here typing to you now… I lost my home, car, job, alienated myself from friends, gave up on school, there were days, hell weeks I couldn’t get out of bed, days I had to choose between food and bills, almost married my who I thought was one of my best friends…. I’m telling you the struggle of life is real… Now, I see it was the combat-related and even gay-related Post Traumatic Stress. I let it get the best of me.
Recently, I have been told I’m a leader in the local Veterans community, Local LGBT community, the local Leather/BDSM community and I still see myself as the shy/lost boy from a small farm community in Texas. Someone that is not afraid to fight for the little guy. I found a way to be fabulous, this is where Mari comes in. She allows me to be that gay super hero I never had growing up. Hope to someday find a man that will love her as much as he claims to love me. (we’ll go into that another time)
Again, thank you Jai for the invite to tonight’s show, I’m truly honored to say I know you and glad to have crossed paths with you many times over the past few years on this chaotic journey we call life. I’m looking forward to the many more adventures, experiences and definitely many more laughs. PS, congrats on the new love interest, may he treat you like the wonderful, talented, caring sweetheart you are deep inside.